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The Enchiridion · 8 of 10

Sections 40–45: Right Judgment

40.Women from fourteen years old are flattered by men with the title of mistresses. Therefore, perceiving that they are regarded only as qualified to give men pleasure, they begin to adorn themselves, and in that to place all their hopes. It is worth while, therefore, to try that they may perceive themselves honored only so far as they appear beautiful in their demeanor and modestly virtuous.

41.It is a mark of want of intellect to spend much time in things relating to the body, as to be immoderate in exercises, in eating and drinking, and in the discharge of other animal functions. These things should be done incidentally and our main strength be applied to our reason.

42.When any person does ill by you, or speaks ill of you, remember that he acts or speaks from an impression that it is right for him to do so. Now it is not possible that he should follow what appears right to you, but only what appears so to himself. Therefore, if he judges from false appearances, he is the person hurt, since he, too, is the person deceived. For if anyone takes a true proposition to be false, the proposition is not hurt, but only the man is deceived. Setting out, then, from these principles, you will meekly bear with a person who reviles you, for you will say upon every occasion, “It seemed so to him.”

43.Everything has two handles: one by which it may be borne, another by which it cannot. If your brother acts unjustly, do not lay hold on the affair by the handle of his injustice, for by that it cannot be borne, but rather by the opposite—that he is your brother, that he was brought up with you; and thus you will lay hold on it as it is to be borne.

44.These reasonings have no logical connection: “I am richer than you, therefore I am your superior.” “I am more eloquent than you, therefore I am your superior.” The true logical connection is rather this: “I am richer than you, therefore my possessions must exceed yours.” “I am more eloquent than you, therefore my style must surpass yours.” But you, after all, consist neither in property nor in style.

45.Does anyone bathe hastily? Do not say that he does it ill, but hastily. Does anyone drink much wine? Do not say that he does ill, but that he drinks a great deal. For unless you perfectly understand his motives, how should you know if he acts ill? Thus you will not risk yielding to any appearances but such as you fully comprehend.

Asked of Guide

Why does Epictetus say everything has “two handles” and how should I use that idea when someone wrongs me?

Epictetus means every situation can be grasped in ways that either make it unbearable or make it manageable; the “handle of his injustice” breaks you, the handle “he is your brother” lets you bear it. He gives a practical rule: refuse the interpretation that feeds anger or superiority and choose the interpretation that preserves your reason and social bond.

This follows Section 42, where he asks you to remember people act from what seems right to them—“It seemed so to him”—so blame misjudgment, not the person’s existence; and it echoes Cicero’s On Duties about acting from justice rather than wrath. Use the kinder, truer handle to keep judgment right and your responses proportioned.

Guide is the guide inside the Gnosis app, where every book on these shelves is free to read. Guide is the part you pay for — your guide has read all of them, and answers about the passage you’re actually on. Ask your guide your own question.

Echoes elsewhere

Gorgias · Classicalas well as of others, of the few or of the many: and rhetoric and any other art should be used by him, and all his actions should be done always, with a view to justice. Follow me The Sibylline Oracles · Classicalfound in Phocylides, and Phocylides having a few not found in the Sibyllines.] A life of probity. Be satisfied With what thou hast and keep thyself from that Which is another's. SpThe Dialogues of Seneca · Stoicismof all that is his: for he lives happy in the present, and without fear for the future. The great Socrates, or any one else who had the same superiority to and power to withstand tApology of Socrates · Classicalmen, and will probably be the death of many more; there is no danger of my being the last of them. Some one will say: And are you not ashamed, Socrates, of a course of life which i