The Way of Perfection · 11 of 46

Chapter 11: She continues the subject of mortification, etc

IT seems to me, my sisters, a very great imperfection to be always complaining of light evils: if you can bear it, do not do so. When the evil is great, it complains of itself: this is another kind of complaint, and it soon appears. Consider, you are few; and if any one among you have such a custom, it is enough to afflict the rest, if you would observe love and charity. But she who is ill – really and truly ill, should mention the case at once, and take what is necessary; for if you have no self-love, you will so dislike all kind of delicacy, that you need not fear using any without necessity, or complaining without cause. When there is cause, it is very good to mention it, and much better than to use any delicacy, without mentioning it, and it would be very wrong if none were to pity you. But of this I am confident, that where there are prayer and charity, and as you are so few that you see one another's necessities, you will never want proper nourishment, nor care in being attended to. But do not complain of certain weaknesses and little indispositions belonging to women; for sometimes the devil fills the imagination with these pains, which go and come, and unless you entirely break off the habit of speaking and complaining of them (except to God), you will never have rest.

I lay great stress on this point, because I consider it very important, and one of the things by which the discipline of monasteries is greatly relaxed: and our body has the fault, – that the more it is honoured, the more necessities it discovers. It is strange to see how it loves to be well treated; and when it has some good excuse, however trifling may be the necessity, it deceives the poor soul, and hinders her improvement. Think, how many poor sick people there are, who have no friend to complain to: now being poor and dainty do not agree together. Think also on the many married persons – even of quality (and some such I know) – who, though they have grievous maladies and suffer great afflictions, dare not complain for fear of displeasing their husbands. Alas! wretched sinner that I am, I know we came not here to be more caressed than they are. Since then you are free from the great troubles of the world, O! learn to endure a little for the love of God, without letting every one know it. Suppose a woman has not married well, who, in order that her husband may know nothing, says nothing nor complains, though she is very unhappy, without unburdening her mind to any one; and shall we not conceal, between God and ourselves, something of those evils which He sends us for our sins? This we should do the more, since the evil is not lessened thereby. In all that I have said, I do not include violent maladies; as for instance, when one has a burning fever, though even then I wish moderation and patience might always be observed: but I speak only of certain indispositions, which one may go about with, and not disturb all the world by our complaints. But what shall I do, if what I have been writing should be seen out of the house? What will all the nuns say of me? O! how willingly would I bear this, if I knew any one would thereby correct her faults! For when there is one of this character, things come to such a pass, that for the most part no one is believed, however grievous her infirmities may be.

Let us call to mind our holy fathers – the ancient hermits, whose life we pretend to imitate. What pains did they endure, and this too all alone! What extreme cold, and hunger, and heat, having no one to complain to – but God! Think you, they were made of iron? No, they had the same flesh as we ourselves have. Believe me, daughters, when once we begin to subdue these our wretched bodies, they do not trouble us so much: there will be enough to observe what you stand in need of: take no care of yourselves, except there be a manifest necessity. Unless we resolve at once to undervalue death and the want of health, we shall never do anything. Endeavour not to fear death, and give yourselves up entirely to God – come what may. What matter should we die? Since our body has so often mocked us, may we not mock it once? Believe me, this resolution is more important than we imagine. If we often practise it, we shall by little and little, with God's assistance, become masters of our body. Now to conquer such an enemy helps us greatly to triumph in the battle of this life. May God grant this favour, since He is able. I am confident that no one knows the gain but he who already enjoys the victory; and this, in my opinion, is so great – that no one would regret the labour which would be required, in order to obtain this repose and dominion.