The Way of Perfection · 18 of 46

Chapter 18: The same subject is continued, in which the saint shows how much greater are the sufferings of the c

I SAY then, daughters, to those amongst you whom God does not lead in this way, that as far as I have seen and understood from those who walk in it, they do not carry a higher cross than you do; and that you would be surprised at the ways and manner whereby God afflicts them. I am acquainted both with the one and the other, and understand clearly that the afflictions which God gives to contemplative souls are intolerable, and of such a character, that unless He gave them these caresses, they could not be endured. And it is evident (since it is true), that those whom God loves, He leads along the road of afflictions: and the more He loves them, the greater are the afflictions. I cannot believe that He abhors contemplative souls, because with His own mouth He commends them, and considers them His friends. It is foolish, therefore, to imagine that He admits into friendship with Him persons who live delicately and without troubles: nay, I am very confident that God sends them greater crosses. And as he leads them through such a rough and uneven way, that sometimes they think they are lost, and must begin the journey again, so His Majesty thinks it necessary to give them some refreshment – not water, but wine – that so being inebriated with this heavenly wine, they may not consider what they suffer, but may be able to endure it.

Hence it is that I see few contemplatives who are not courageous, and resolved to suffer; for, if they be weak, the first thing our Lord does is to infuse courage into them, and make them not fear afflictions. I believe that those of the active life, when they see how they are caressed for a little while, think there is nothing else but those consolations: but I tell you, that perhaps you could not endure for one day what they do. Thus, as our Lord knows what all are fit for, He gives every one their employment, as He sees it is most expedient for their souls, His own glory, and the good of their neighbour. And since this does not depend upon your having disposed yourselves, be not afraid lest you should lose your labour.

Consider what I say – that we must all aim at this object, since we are here for no other purpose; and that not for one or two years only; no, nor for ten, lest we may seem to act like cowards. It is well if our Lord sees not that we are in fault, like soldiers, who, though they may have been long in the service, must always be ready to perform whatever the captain may command them, or to take whatever post he gives them, since he will pay them very handsomely. But how much better pay will our King give, than any one here on earth! Now, as the captain, when he sees his men present, and thoroughly knows what his men are fit for, distributes their posts according to their abilities: so, my sisters, apply yourselves to mental prayer; and whoever cannot do this, let them use vocal prayer, reading, and colloquies with God; as I shall explain hereafter, let them not leave their hours of prayer (because they know not when the Bridegroom may come), lest they share the same fate as the foolish virgins. Perhaps He will send them more trouble, under the appearance of consolation: but if He give it not, let such know they are unfit for it, that the other course is best for them. Here we have an opportunity of meriting by humility and believing sincerely – that they are not even fit for that which they do; yet they go cheerfully serving Him in what is commanded them, as I have said. And if this humility be sincere, blessed is she who is such a servant in the active life, for she will complain of no one but herself: let her leave others to their war in which they are engaged, and this is no trifling one. For though the ensign does not fight in the battle, yet he is not therefore exempt from being in great danger, and must needs suffer more in his interior than all the rest, because, as he carries the colours, he cannot defend himself, nor let them go out of his hands, though the enemy should cut him to pieces. And so contemplatives are to carry erect the standard of humility, and bear all the blows the enemy gives, and to return none, because their duty is to suffer like Christ, and to carry the cross on high, nor let it go out of their hands on account of any dangers whatever; neither must they show any weariness in suffering; for this purpose it is that they are advanced to so honourable a post.

Let them consider what they do, for if the ensign should desert his colours, the battle is lost; and so, I believe there is great hurt done to those others who are not so advanced (in perfection), if they see that those whom they already consider to be captains and favourites of God, do not act in their works conformably to the post they hold. The common soldiers act as well as they can, and sometimes move from one place to another, when they see themselves in greater danger: no one takes notice of this, nor is any one discouraged thereby: but the ensigns draw all eyes upon them, and cannot stir without being observed. The post is good and very honourable, and the king does a favour to him, on whom he bestows it: hence their obligation is so much the greater, in order to discharge properly the duties of their office.

Thus, sisters, we neither know nor understand what we ask; let our Lord, therefore, do what He pleases, for He knows us better than we do ourselves; and it is humility to be content with what is given us, for it seems there are some who, in justice, wish to ask favours of God! A pretty kind of humility this! The searcher of all men does well, then (in my opinion), by seldom granting favours to such persons: He plainly sees they are unworthy to drink of His chalice.

To know then, daughters, whether you have made any progress, you must judge by this mark, viz. – if every one considers herself the most wicked among you all; and if it appear by her actions that she thinks so, for the good and advantage of the rest; but not if she have more caresses in prayer – more raptures and visions, and favours of this kind, which God may bestow upon her. These we must hope for in the other world, in order to understand their value. This other is current money – a revenue which fails not – an estate in perpetuity, and not an annuity which ceases (for the other goes and comes). I allude to the great virtue of humility, mortification, and entire obedience, by not acting in the least point against the commands of the Superior, knowing for certain that God commands you, since the Superior holds His place.

Obedience is that virtue, on which I should enter more at large: but because I believe if nuns are wanting in this point, they are no nuns at all, I say nothing about it; for I speak to nuns (and I think to good ones – at least they desire to be such); and hence, in a matter so important, and so well understood, I add but one word, lest it be forgotten. I say, then, that whoever is under obedience by vow, and fails therein, not using every exertion to observe her vow with the utmost perfection, I cannot understand why she remains in the monastery. I can assure her at least, that as long as she remains here, she will never become a contemplative, nor even a good nun in the active life. This I consider certain; and though she may not be a person who is obliged thereto. yet if she desire or intend to arrive at contemplation, it will be necessary for her (in order to proceed more securely) to submit her own will, with full determination, to a confessor who is himself a contemplative. It is well known, that in this way she may advance more in a year, than without it in many; but because it does not concern you much, I need not say more about it.

I conclude, that these are the virtues which I desire you, my daughters, should possess, or endeavour to procure, and devoutly envy the possessors of them. As for other devotions, be not solicitous, or troubled at your not having them; they are uncertain things. It may be that in others they come from God; yet in you, His Majesty may permit them to be an illusion of the devil, and that he may deceive you as he has done others. Why do you desire to serve God in a doubtful way, when you have so many secure ways whereby to serve Him. I have dwelt so much on this point, because I know it is necessary, since our nature is weak: and those His Majesty will strengthen, on whom He wishes to bestow contemplation. As to those on whom He does not bestow it, I am glad I have given them directions, whence the contemplatives also may have a means of humbling themselves. May our Lord, by His goodness, give us light to follow His will in everything, and we shall have no cause to fear.